The wandering seeker in that classic book on the Jesus prayer, The Way of a Pilgrim, asked
incredulously “How is it possible not to love God our Creator and preserver?”
But the wise old monk to whom he had gone for confession responded, “Turning my
eyes carefully upon myself and watching the course of my inward state, I have
verified by experience that I do not love God.... For if I loved God I should
be continually thinking about Him with heartfelt joy. Every thought of God
would give me gladness and delight. On the contrary, I much more eagerly think
about earthly things, and thinking about God is labor and dryness. If I loved
God, then talking with Him in prayer would be my nourishment and delight and
would draw me to unbroken communion with Him. But, on the contrary, I not only
find no delight in prayer, but even find it an effort.... If one person loves
another, he thinks of him throughout the day without ceasing, he pictures him
to himself, he cares for him, and in all circumstances his beloved friend is
never out of his thoughts. But I, throughout the day, scarcely set aside even a
single hour in which to sink deep down into meditation upon God, to inflame my
heart with love of Him...”
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